AJ's Draft, 30 man roster, 10 teams, 11X1, keepers

Bob – 1st pick is tough because u wait so long til your next one but you did get an Ace which was good. Best pick was Lopez in 22nd Rd, You must have had a brain fart in Rds 10 & 11 with Rios before Swisher or Magglio and JJ Putz before Hoffman or Smoltz. They are old but had great numbers and did not show signs of slowing down. Johnson is out for 1st month so your hitting will be hurting. Power B+ If Huff is back to old self, could be higher Speed C Rios needs to run which the BlueJays never do.Starters B+ Rogers that late, def not a gamble Closers C+ Rivera is good for a stint on the DL. Overall Grade B Bench is hurting with Johnson starting on DL and platoon Ofs.

Conlan – You pick SPs for their stats, not their looks you fruitcake. Sheets is injured prone and not on a winning team. So many other SP’s would have been better: Zito, Wang, or Lackey. Great pick with Figgins that late, not sure why he lasted that long. You got good speed but may be missing power. 3 Mets and Larry, that must have hurt picking him. Power B- Need Tex and Cantu to bounce back. Speed B 2 guys can only carry your team so far. Starters C+ Era will be high, 2 starters will be on DL at least once Closers B You have 2 good ones. Overall Grade B- Probably the most white boys ever on a fantasy team, very anti-Omar Minaya.

Storiale – You struck out big time with K-Rod in the 4th rd. Possibly the worst pick in the draft. You got Pinerio in 24th rd and numbers will be similar. Could have had strikeout leaders from both leagues, doh. Need Lee and Hunter come back strong, very strong middle infielders and middle relief with is usually worthless. Power B- Many guys that can hit 30+ is always nice. Speed D Part time Freel and Jeter will have u at the bottom. Starters B Santana will keep any staff low in era and whip. Arroyo faded in 2nd half, better hop Clemens is there to save your staff. Closers B Better hope u win this category when choosing a closer over Peavy and Lee. Overall Grade C+ Young and Barfield go better than 20/20 as projected, team could make a run.

Tidgwell – Great draft up until u got dizzy and picked Izzy 12th. Keep drinking the pepsi and lay off the zima. Burell was a reach, Swisher or Lugo would have been a safer pick. Nice staff with low era and high k’s, stock up on Rolaids with that run of yankee pitchers as many fans witnessed last year. Power A- Every position can hit 20+ with Howard vying for 60. Speed C Ichiro, Damon and ???? Starters B+ This staff will be up there in most pitching categories. Closers D Except this one, Izzy is iffy, Jones will be passed by Zumaya, and Wickman is in dreaded Braves bullpen. Overall Grade B Hitting over powers pitching in fantasy. You’ll be on waiver wire looking for closers.

Murphy – A-Rod over Hafner, stop watching YES classic reruns, A-Rod had 10 RBI’s only once. Consistent at every position but guess u tanked closers. Ryan is nice but others are in-waiting and by then u may be out of it. Liriano is a sweet keeper. Power B- Many players with 20+ but only true power hitters are Konerko and Hafner. Oh wait u picked A-Rod instead. At least you will get to read a lot about him in the paper, let me know what type of toilet paper he uses. Speed B- Crawford is great to have and maybe Patterson’s year wasn’t a fluke. Starters C+ Roy Boy n Dough Boy leading the staff. Closers C Keep your fingers crossed Jones and Gagne get hurt or falter early. Overall Grade B- Hughes and Escobar will help the staff, nice bench if guys get injured.

Chapin - Schmidt was a steal in the 9th rd. Hope you’re a good chiropractor: Vlad,Thome, Big Unit all may need your help. Nice base stealers but that’s all they will give ya. Power B Just an injury away from being screwed and that could happen with a sneeze. Speed A- Pierre and Roberts are a great speed combo, Baldelli, Upton, and Young could contribute. Starters B Workhorses can usually keep your staff up their in categories. Contract year for Zambrano could spell CYClosers C- Street needs to be him old-young self. Hells Bells is a great tune and great to have on your team Overall Grade B Well balanced team that if healthy will be vying for a title

Carpino – Solid infield with 2 big bobbers in the OF. Pitching has question marks and could be studs or duds. Seeing Boston’s luck in the past, don’t expect much from Mastuzaka or a rebound from Beckett. Guess you’ve become a red sox fan, just don’t talk like one or you’ll get beat up like u did in 3rd grade. Like the Hamels pick, great upside. Power B- Which Manny will show up, Jones in contract year should make him move his fat ass. Speed C+ MI will get you the sb’s but OF wont contribute much. Starters C Potential is there but so many ifs. If u picked Verlander, Schmidt or Harang instead of the Phenom, u would be a better drafter. Closers B+ Closers on cruddy teams means saves. Overall Grade C+ Hitting looks nice but you may get ill watching your pitchers and suzaka all over yourself.

Proch – Proch could have had Pronk, teamed with Ortiz, yikes instead goes with Sizemore who can do it all. Nice 2B/SS combo. Sun was shining on your ass when u picked Papelbon and Zito was still available next round. Then u crap yourself and pick Chavez instead of Figgins. Picking Bonds must have blew ur head up as Hamels would have been a better pick then Sanchez. Carpino must have sighed hard when u dirty sanchezed yourself. You may want to take Pepto-bismo as you have diahrear of the mouth when it comes to picking at times. Are u missing hitters? Power D+ Big Pappi can only do so much with a little Proch. Speed B- 2 speedsters and then whoever to be added Starters C Hope you know first aid, your guys have seen the DL more then you’ve seen T&A. Closers C- If last year was a nightmare and they wake up, could be nice picks but it was real ugly last year so doubtful Overall Grade C- Tough when u are missing so many pieces and the one u do have tend to break easily.

Ed – Mauer that early is scary, great average but low power and rbi’s. Then Santana going early, he is not even #1 on his own team. Obviously you were named after Mr. Ed cause you’re a horse’s ass with these picks. You could have made it up but go with an alcholic instead of a zen master in Zito. Maybe if the beers cold u will win the gold. Or at least u will have a drinking buddy when u are at the bottom. Myers can beat you silly for me. Kemp that late was a bright side, u must have been bending over when picking that one. Power C If Shelf cream still works, power will increase. Hall was a great pick in 14th rd but don’t expect to match last years numbers Steals D with an injured Pod, Fielder may lead your team in stills. Guess ur steals will be like your sex life, caught at 2nd. Starters B- Nice 2nd tier pitchers but no Ace unless u count Santana, oh that’s the wrong one. Closers D No one has a closer job going into the season. Overall Grade C Pitcher heavy with no aces or closers. My advice, start drinking heavily as it will be along season.

Makris – May have had the best draft. Just better hope Mets or Yanks don’t go in a slump. Many Hr/Sb guys which never hurts when 1 has gone 40/40 and 1st pick could go 30/30. Power B- Griffey that late will be sweet when he comes back to hit 30+. Speed B Could be real sweet if Pie comes into the mix. Starters A- Bonderman, Smoltz, and Berdard that late were great safe picks and Duke may show his 2005 was for real. Closers B- Everyone loves seeing Ozzie do the fat man call to the bullpen and for good reason, he gets the job done. Overall Grade B+ The favorite going into the season, hopefully you manage well and don’t make bonehead trades for Timo may finally get his championship.

To the league: Thanks for letting me rate and rant about your teams, hope you have a fun time reading it and no beef with me. Would love to hear your feedback. Please get back to me during all-star break to see how my predictions came back and I can re-evaluate your teams after trades and FA pick ups. Just out of curiousity, how wasn’t Mulder, Gibbons, Cameron, Giles(Brian or Marcus) were just some of many stars not picked